Thursday, July 5, 2012

What Kind of Vampire Are You?

Vampires are real...and they're everything you believe them to be: deadly, frightening, calculating, and evil. You've probably encountered them in every area of your life and, most likely, at any hour of the day. But what you may not know is that instead of protecting your neck, what you need to protect is your space. For the "vampires" I'm speaking of are not of the Twilight or True Blood variety; they're "emotional vampires"--those people who come into your space and drain the life right out of you. Not literally, of course, but whose negative energy i.e. complaining, mean-spiritedness, nagging, gossiping, spitefulness, and drama, suddenly shifts your positive energy to match theirs. Often times, it's done unaware; and at other times, you could be that very person causing that shift for someone else.

Energy is indeed real. Iyanla Vanzant once said "You are equally as responsible for the energy you put out as you are the energy you allow into your space." How many times have you sat in a meeting and, depending on who walked in or out, felt the vibrations shift in the room? Or notice how different the vibration feels when certain people are out of the office--even those who don't work with you directly? How about being out with a group of girlfriends and the absence of one changing the entire mood of the evening? Or having your phone ring and, upon seeing the caller ID, feeling your energy decrese or increase depending on who it is? So what to do about it? First and foremost, get aware; secondly, get active.

Often times--such as at work--we have no choice but to accomodate the variance of energies we encounter. But in our personal lives, we have a choice. It just all depends on how much you value your peace of mind and are willing to protect it.  The complaining associate? Politely end the conversation. The perpetually angry friend? Limit your contact. The compulsive gossiper? Change the subject. The loafing adult child? Move them out. Start to take note of your physical reaction to certain people and their behaviors, and respect it as a litmus test to let you know what is not serving you well. And if you're the person exhibiting these behaviors (and often, you know who you are), there's no time like the present to put yourself on a self-induced "negativity fast," while you begin unearthing what's at the root of your "need to bleed" others with your vampire-ish ways.

As I often say, "If you're not sowing joy into someone's life, then you're most likely taking joy away from it." Don't do it to others and don't allow it to be done to you. To quote Donna Karan, "Accent your positive and delete your negative." Even if that deletion includes people. Your peace of mind--and, ultimately, your health--depends on it!